02.07:073
RICHARD JORDAN
Basic Functions
We men
are rather indifferent
to the whole process.
My dog--he
has a higher
purpose.
We sometimes let out
private but
emphatic grunts or moans.
My dog-he sends
his message to the whole
of canine population.
We, in public restrooms,
let our eyes wander
to size up competition.
My dog-with essence
says, males keep away;
this is my domain.
We usually just do
what we do, then
quickly flush it away.
My dog-his
remains say:
hey, all you bitches
out there, I'm ready
and I'm willing.
A shame we modern
men cannot tap
into the basics
of this function.
But then...
My dog sniffs butt.
And I write
poetry.
|
Editor wrote: No problem with four letters words; been accused myself of writing 'pornpoetry'. BUT, I use the words to elicit context. Here I don't see it (you use 'urination' later so the 'pissing' seems only an attention grabber. The comparison between man and his best friend is good though, and universal. Cotton Mather in MAGNALIA CHRISTI AMERICANA (late 1600s or early 17) wrote a passage about HOW, on his way to church as he pisses into a bush, a cur comes along to piss on him. He finds this to mean that a man caught between good and evil stands on earth to waste the earth. But the dog stands on a three part god, it LIFTS itself not to waste but to leave its mark. Thus the lesson is that a dog pisses natural - divinely, while man ignores his divine nature. I guess 'shake three times' is also a message. Lastly, the poem seems almost a prose message with a didactic closure. Can you rework it a bit with new title for publication? Otherwise this poem will not work for me. Sorry. Perhaps the issues should meet in each stanza rather than stand in separate stanzas. ORIGINAL VERSION...SCROLL DOWN
copyright
| 
02.07:Contents
|
Poets
Parts
MAIL
02.07
073
074
075
076
077
078
079
080
081
082
083
084
TOP
|
