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"I had many things to write, but I will not with ink and pen write unto thee..."
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ALLAN JOHNSTON
Attacking Solipsism with Flour Tortillas			

I leave a trail of whiteness,
the flour leaking out of my hand
on the dark grain of the wooden counter —
a bestrewal of stars Milky Way

strange
constellations

And with water and another hand,
foment a world — one gooey, pasty
ball por las tortillas
de la masa harina

My English acquaintance called it "flaw." 
I say "flour," naming the name
of all that blooms, scouring the vowel,
a rounded mouth murdering English
English, pistil tongue ululating beneath
teeth,
thereby bringing
name to the Humean
flaw of perception
created on table tops
via these shifty
sifted trails I now
call con- 

stel-
lations;

estes panes calientes, a knowledge
of hunger, a beasty feast, yeasty
or unleavened —
what of these grains,
too fine to discern
except en masse,
vision or creation?
What of perception? 
I defy solipsism:

a quick, hard rolling! A pin! A hot pan! 	


---ABOUT ALLAN JOHNSTON---
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poetryREPAIRs: Concourse or confluence of people at or in a place; resort, frequent or habitual going; making one's way; to arrive; to dwell; to heal, to cure, to recover; to renew; (AND!) to fix to original condition - Oxford English Dictionary.
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ALLAN JOHNSTON
My Poems

My poems range from spontaneous text-flows written within a few minutes to works written and rewritten over years until they reach some level of satisfaction or abandonment. The poem "Waitress," as an example, exists in four different forms, of which two have been published elsewhere. All were written before any were published. The poems often build from rhythm and sound and relate to imagined experiences sometimes extrapolated from life, observation, meditation, or all these combining. For example, I did work with a Goan in Denver for a while who called flower "flaw"--basically a British pronunciation. In the past I tended to want to get to the immediacy of psychic experience in my writing by being as spontaneous as possible, thereby supposedly connecting into the creative unconscious. More recently these thought processes have slowed down to let in simultaneous double intents in meaning in words and passages. Thus I might rehearse a phrase in my head for a while before I write anything about it down. This all moves between Dionysis and Apollo. Probably it all sounds like malarky or worse, but it perhaps touches on some of the processes I undergo.


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ALLAN JOHNSTON
Waitress			

She has spent all these years getting mad at the main course,
dancing in and out through the door—

the sad chocolate cream pies, plates of potatoes,
quickly side-arming it down as she twists

in front of the guy whose cigarette floats
in his leftover coffee: the thing she's dying for;

her own escape, break: the alcove between
the kitchen and here where the heads plunge toward food

lifting up on old forks –– cigarettes, gin,
sleep bearing her off, nightly valium:

away from the daily bread she gives up
out of boredom or pain. A Disney-white cap

and apron over the orangish, muddy
dress, earth-brown like a deep muck one finds

in rich scoops of back-washed swamps where dead fill
gathers and sinks, heats, compacts to earth:

the dress, these careworn hands, these nails
hot red over chipped and bitten reality

and nicotine stains: the lipsticked swishes
that argue against taking anything

like you as human or worth the time
except as a passing check, a quick buck —

if there were some way of making it,
she would not be here, leaving butts afloat

in styrofoam take-out coffee-cup ashtrays
she takes outside each time it is too much,

needing her freedom just for those moments
it takes to suck the delicious blue poisonous

smoke of a cigarette under the neon —
this light that is always erasing the stars.




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