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© DAVID McLEANDAVID McLEAN courtly love forgets the lesion that is the ego rituals of courtly love gnawed down by time's eternal tooth, god forgotten, god-forgotten masters ecclesiastical authenticated solemn sixteen mediaeval prepuces of jesus. love was ever mystical, brings unknown creeping feeling to beaten-down hearts and must surely be a good thing for some - yet here in word invisible, a secret the happy ones tell each other, the happy hominids like Nancy and Sid, not forgetting the courtly love Kurt felt for Courtney Love. as good as any other, god wot, that love was, inscribing again down time the sometime lies we tell each other, the lies we tell ourselves, blessed anything that streams unpain upon us these days so dog bless love and the hormones creating it, if love brings the good then love is good like any other benign curing illusion reassuring, like any other therapeutic hypnosis medicinal, like any other drug, it were well if lovers' nights were longer, they say, that day not intrude with Eos' prying prurient eye to stay their pleasures with fugitive shame, that love not be the same. drunk already at an earlier breast though dawn equally unwelcome be for me unloving, unloved, and nameless faceless shameless without Amanda's latter graces. tedious and fastidious one may probe the evolution of chevalric love - its convoluted progress convolving the genders and the unmystical members involved; surely several legitimate bastard tendernesses love may claim and wear proud in its own vaunted name. and who would dream of denying this? but the wise soul-searchers, Lacans and Freuds, have unlaughing delved deep in our self-trenches, amatory seeded our psyches with budding shoots of knowledge; is love possible for a being that not know what it is? can a person say indeed this is me and surely i love? what overweening hybris is not this? deeming the own judgement the proof of love, knowing sure the self and its innermost tendencies and assaying with gibberish a heart to move? (such were the platitudes of the poverty of poetry, word-impotent dooming auto-oblivion - forgetting the self our subtle lesion.) ever remember, children, the self-forgetting dialectics of recognition a younger and wiser Hegel dreamed in his frisky "Phoenix" when his belovèd Marie's anger deepened his reason; for they are a sounder answer sounding through history, and even a "me" has strings to answer to an older Eros' hoary mystery, without the chevalric, without nightfall's sonnets, without the patriarchy's economy of brutalising promises, inexpressible love eluded this poem's evasive meaning when her dream of nothing gave reason its resonant reasons slowly believing.
REPAIR: Concourse or confluence of people at or in a place; resort, frequent or habitual going; making one's way; to arrive; to dwell; to heal, to cure, to recover; to renew; (AND!) to fix to original condition. Oxford English Dictionary
POETRYrePAIRS reads poetry from January 1 through November 1
