PAUL HOSTOVSKY's Unlikely Loves : Fame
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PAUL HOSTOVSKY's Unlikely Loves
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I used to wonder what it felt like to be David Mitnik who had hair under his arms already in the 6th grade. More specifically, I wondered if one could feel the hair there, if one had hair there, or was it more like the hair on your head which you can't really feel unless the sun is beating down on it or the rain has soaked it through, and then, arguably, it's the rain or sun you feel and not the hair per se. But the hair that grew where the sun didn't shine—now that I knew nothing about at the tender famous age of twelve and a half. I didn't want to be David Mitnik, I just wanted something like an autograph— what might rub off of his signature armpit hair by being in his presence, on his team, or even in his chair in his absence. I remember once when he was absent, I sat down at his desk—still warm, it seemed, from so much precociousness— and I imagined myself in his skin, the hair crowding my seat like a crowd in their seats, each individual tendril standing and cheering, doing the wave, rooting for puberty! Which finally came, of course, but it grew old fast. And it wasn't long before I ached to return to the obscure vacant lots of childhood where nothing much grew, and the old games ruled, and the smooth balls flew.
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She left everything open— windows, doors, drawers, cabinets, the little cap on the tube of toothpaste, letting the air in, letting the bugs in, letting everything in—while he, on the other hand, was a firm believer in twisties and double knots, double bagging and double checking to make sure the door was double locked. You could say she trusted while he trussed. He wanted to bind her to him, with that wedding band on the one hand; on the other, she wanted to keep their relationship open. "The heart must remain open," she said. He closed his eyes and exhaled miserably. "And where does that leave us?" he asked, and opened his eyes and saw that she was sitting close to him on the couch, her mouth slightly open, as if to say "kiss me" without saying it.
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